1.How has a gay, disabled, autistic NEET who's too shy to talk to a bunch of other gay autistic NEETs on mic been on more dates than me?
Personality most definitely the strong point, always and forever. People have a tendency to feel really comfortable around me and I can be pretty entertaining to be around. I managed to figure out how to keep my weird hidden by the time I entered high school, but previous to that I was definitely 'that creepy kid'. People just never saw me being an autistic retard, but at home I'd just play MMOs and watch anime. And I was really into the paranormal, conspiracies, ancient astronauts, all that stuff.
I was also always an ace student and seemed to be going places (look where I ended up though, haha). Helps that I'm tall with a decent face and large shoulders too so I don't have any any physical features working against me.
Also I had the outright dumb luck to always end up in classes with a male minority. Until college anyway. So I didn't really have to compete for attention.
2.How do I get grills to like me?
I have no idea. Only thing I've ever done is be less... me. But in general, make yourself noticed, and be fun to be around. Doubt I have to say you need to take care of your appearance.
And people will come to you.